"WE'RE OFFERING IT IN SUPPOSITORY FORM...
WATCH, I'LL PUT IT IN MY MOUTH TO DEMONSTRATE..."
'IF IT DOESN'T KILL YOU, IT MAKES YOU STRONGER...
AND IF IT MAKES YOU REALLY SICK, WE MAKE A LOT OF MONEY!"
GENOME MAP OF A VACCINE
BILL GATES' NEW CV667 CORONAVIRUS VACCINE:
SECRET INGREDIENTS LEAKED BY FORMER LAB TECH
An unnamed former technician for Microsoft's top-secret Nano-Weapons for the Master Race lab has put his/her/its life on the line by releasing to the press a partial list of the ingredients in Bill Gates' new vaccine for the coronavirus that is wreaking havoc on minds and bodies around the world.
This vaccine, believed to be on the verge of approval by the W.H.O., believed to have been given the 'swastika of approval' by macro-eugenics consultant Henry Kissinger, and to be manufactured by a consortium of pharmaceutical corporations led by Bayer and Abbot Industries, is capable of rapid deployment into just about any body orifice.
A partial list of ingredients includes (not in order of % composition):
1) Roundup...aka glyphosate, only kills bad weeds
2) Lysol...sanitary disinfectant, keeps your bowl fresh
3) DDT...dichlorodiphenyltrichloroethane...the original bio-cide
4) 1080...sodium monofluoroacetate...only kills bad pests in drawn-out agony
5) glue (super, Elmer's, epoxy and liquid nails)...helps you stick to it!
6) fluoride..gives balls, backbones, brains and a sense of rebellion!
7) mercury, lead, zinc, arsenic, hexavalent chromium...essential heavy metals
8) plutonium, Americium-241, Technicium-97...extended half-lives for mutagens
9) sugar...ultra-white ultra-refined cane sucrose
10) Rectose..."It's the REAL butt-sugar"...the original information placebo
11) insect parts, rodent hair, feces...vax extender, adds body
12) mold spores...can survive in a vacuum and close to absolute zero
13) ionizable metallic salts...for conducting microwaves more efficiently
14) sparkler dust...helps you 'go up in smoke' more readily
15) glow-in-the-dark stuff...aids in nocturnal surveillance
16) dust from the Grand Wazoo...courtesy of Frank Zappa
17) bear bile...ancient Chinese remedy for just about everything
18) bat phlegm...effective only if bat is uncooked
19) eye of newt...traditional medieval potion ingredient
20) gluten...because, because, because, because, because...
21) DMT...so you can SEE IT ALL clearly for a few minutes
22) nano-particles...helps your reconfiguration into trans-human
23) Morgellon's fibers...added...fiber
24) fiberglass...adds strength to your inner surf-board & kayak
25) battery acid...dissolves anything you no longer need
26) chlorine...purifies the gene pool and bleaches your hair
27) nail-polish remover...so the next colour can be applied!
28) moon-shine...keeps the radiator clean
29) anti-freeze...preferred lethal beverage of cats
30) petrol (gasoline, 97 octane)..for sniffing or combustion
31) caffeine, nicotine...keeps your monkeys awake and steady
32) carbon dioxide...helps you to photosynthesize
33) fentanyl...to ease the pain
34) lithium...to lift your spirits
35) Prozac...'once were worriers'
36) thorazine...when the day is done and you wanna run...
37) MSG...Mono-Sodium GLUtamate
38) aspartame...an artificially sweet first-order carcinogen
39) 'tincture of tenderness'...Milton the Monster got the whole vial
40) rabies...frothing induced by fear of water
41) clap...what is the sound of one genitalia with clap?
42) herpes...found in conjunction with HISpes?
43) measles...childhood outbreaks of epidermal sores
44) mumps...childhood swelling of lymph nodes
45) influenza...new strains appear every 11.2 years
46) small pox...prefers to live in woolen blankets
47) malaria...mosquitos don't get it, why do we?
48) cholera...many beautiful remote tourst destinations need this
49) ebola...similar to flesh-bacteria
50) the Andromeda Strain...it's a crystal, silly wabbit
51) Raid...'kills bugs dead!'
52) WD-40...unfreezes lock-down
53) Mycoxaflopin...helps you to stand firm
53) Aborted fetus tissue
54) Embryonic stem-cells
55) pus from inflamed dairy cow udders
56) thawed microbes from 256 million year old Antarctica ice core sample
57) reanimation compound...brought zombies to life in Night of the Living Dead
58) Ephemerol...drug that created Scanners
51) Raid...'kills bugs dead!'
52) WD-40...unfreezes lock-down
53) Mycoxaflopin...helps you to stand firm
53) Aborted fetus tissue
54) Embryonic stem-cells
55) pus from inflamed dairy cow udders
56) thawed microbes from 256 million year old Antarctica ice core sample
57) reanimation compound...brought zombies to life in Night of the Living Dead
58) Ephemerol...drug that created Scanners
